The Island English Tutor
Nanaimo English Tutor, AJ Mittendorf.
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TONGUE TWISTERS

Tongue twisters are fun. No matter how difficult they may be to read aloud, no matter how much a person  dislikes the subject of English in school, everyone finds something to enjoy about tongue twisters. What do they teach us? Well, not necessarily a great deal. They are helpful in improving elocution. Other than that, they are just fun.

Now, I like poetry. A tongue twister need not be poetry, but they are all the better from my perspective when they are poems. As a result, the tongue twisters here are mostly poems. Will you learn anything? Nope. But read them aloud over and over and watch your speech improve over time.
A Limerick

A tutor who tooted the flute
tried to tutor two tooters to toot.
Said the two to their tutor,
"Is it harder to toot or
to tutor two tooters to toot?"


A Question

Are our oars ore or are our oars oak?


 A Quippy Verse

Moses supposes his toeses are roses,
but Moses supposes erroneously;
for nobody's toeses are poses of roses,
as Moses supposes his toeses to be.


The Peter Piper Poem

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.
If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,
where's the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?


Piqued by Peter Piper

Piqued by Piper's pepper pick in pickle pots,
I peeked at Peter's pickled pepper peck in lots,
Peaked in piles by Mrs. Piper, Pepper Potts.


A Parody of the Peter Piper Poem

Theophilus Thistle, the thistle sifter,
sifted a sieve of un-sifted thistles.
If Theophilus Thistle, the thistle sifter,
sifted a sieve of un-sifted thistles,
where is the sieve of un-sifted thistles
Theophilus Thistle, the thistle sifter, sifted?


A Poem

Amidst the mists and coldest frosts
with stoutest wrists and loudest boasts,
he thrusts his fist against the posts
and still insists he sees the ghosts.


Betty Botter

Betty Botter bought some butter,
"But," said she, "this butter's bitter.
If I bake this bitter butter,
it will make my batter bitter,
But a bit of better butter--
that would make my batter better."
So she bought a bit of butter
better than her bitter butter,
and she baked it in her batter,
thus the batter was not bitter.
So, 'twas better Betty Botter
bought her bit of better butter.


Fuzzy Wuzzy

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear.
Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair.
Fuzzy Wuzzy wasn't fuzzy, was he?


Nonsense

Girl gargoyle, guy gargoyle,
Gal gargoyle, Grrr, gargoyle.


The Woodchuck

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck
if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
The woodchuck would chuck
all the wood he could chuck--
as much as any woodchuck would--
if a woodchuck could chuck wood.


The Bear and the Hare

I cannot bear to see a bear
bear down upon a hare.
When bare of hair he strips the hare
I cry, "Forbear!"


The Bear and the Boar

Once upon a barren moor
there dwelt a bear, also a boar.
The bear could not bear the boar.
The boar thought the bear a bore.
At last the bear could bear no more
of that boar that bored him on the moor,
and so one morn he bored the boar--
That boar will bore the bear no more;
the boar will bear the bear no more;
the bear will bore the boar no more;
the bear will bear the boar no more.


A Flea and a Fly in a Flue
(A Limerick)

A flea and a fly in a flue
were imprisoned, so what could they do?
Said the fly, "Let us flee!"
"Let us fly!" said the flea.
So they flew through a flaw in the flue.

        --Ogden Nash


The Hottentot Tot

If a Hottentot taught a Hottentot tot
to talk ere the tot could totter,
ought the Hottentot tot
be taught to say aught or naught
or what ought to be taught her?
If to hoot and to toot a Hottentot tot
be taught by her Hottentot tutor,
ought the tutor get hot
if the Hottentot tot
Hoot and toot at her Hottentot tutor?


Paradox

If one doctor doctors another doctor,
does the doctor who doctors the doctor,
doctor the doctor the way the doctor he is doctoring doctors,
or does he doctor the doctor the way
the doctor who doctors doctors?


Needling

I need not your needles; they're needless to me,
for kneading of noodles, 'twere needless, you see.
But did my neat knickers but need to be kneed,
I then should have need of your needles, indeed.


Think-a-Thought

I thought a thought,
but the thought I thought
was not the thought
I thought I thought.


Felt Felt

Of all the felt I ever felt,
I never felt a piece of felt
that felt as fine as that felt felt
when first I felt that felt that's felt.


On Mules

On mules we find two legs behind
and two we find before.
We stand behind before we find
what those behind be for.


Three Gray Geese

Three gray geese in the green grass grazing:
Gray were the geese and green was the grass.


Night Light

You've no need to light a night light
on a light night like tonight,
for a night light's light's  a slight light,
and tonight's a night that's light.
When a night's light, like tonight's light,
it is really not quite right
to light night lights with their slight lights--
on a light night like tonight.


Write's Right

"Write," we know is written right
when we see it written "write."
But when we see it written "wright,"
we know 'tis not, then, written right.
For "write," to have it written right,
must not be written "right" or "wright,"
nor yet should it be written "rite,"
but "write," for so 'tis written right.




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